Longings and desires

Have you ever felt like a misfit? As I boy I was ignored because of my small size and immaturity. In High School I was attracted to a classmate but was told she was only interested in upperclassmen. I attended a regional high school where I was considered an outsider because I lived in a small town. I assumed that as I entered the ministry everything would change, and they did for a season. Then my politics changed!

As long as I believed in the party line I was accepted; I was like the rest. Peer pressure wasn't really pressure because I had already conformed to it. Spiritual writers are right when they say the devil doesn't have to tempt his children; they already sin willfully. He only tempts those who are seeking to break Satan's power. Then temptation is the strongest. When I moved to Worcester and began to experience the pressures of inner city living and the inadequacy of my political views to experience relief, I began to look at a more "politically liberal" perspective on life. I also began to study the Bible to understand what the role of government was as well as the role of the church in public life. What I experienced was a transformation of thought and an alienation from my evangelical colleagues.

As a Christian God has always had me involved in prayer ministry. I am convinced that all divine work emanates from prayer. Personal spirituality is foundational to my understanding of living for Jesus. We are told to pray the Lord's Prayer, which is Jesus' vision for his church; we are told to pray for government because it holds our peace in its hand. If you want to accomplish something for God it must come from prayer. My evangelical colleagues understand that to a certain degree (I think they spend too much time tweaking programs to make them work and too little time trusting God).

As a Christian Citizen I realize that God works in our civic lives through government. Government is God's shepherd for its citizens. As we have seen in the health care debate, politics is a very dirty business. However, politics is the way government is accomplished and my civic life is managed. There is no need for less government because then we citizens will do what is right in our own eyes. We need government to discipline our own corruption.

What is needed is a Christian citizen who will be a prayer warrior and an activist; someone who has authority with God through prayer and authority with government through political action. I yearn to be part of a clergy prayer group that is also politically active. So far I have been frustrated.

A leader within the Southern Baptist Convention identified my problem: Wally, you have the theology of a Southern Baptist and the political views of the Cooperative Baptists. Perhaps what I wish is that Southern Baptists would be examine the authoritative Scriptures to discover that they teach us how to live as well as what to believe.

I'm writing this on the cusp of a new year. Next week I will be attending a conference with fellow clergy and Henry Blackaby; perhaps, I will discover a kindred spirit. Will you pray that you will discover prayer partners to help you be active in life, and pray for me that I may find that prayer group that believes in activism.